Eastman Adoption

Final Post

2008-08-18T17:48:00.001-07:00

All -

Thank you so much for following our adoption story. Our intent was to create a record of our adoption process, not to continue the blog once we were home and living our new life. Even though that is a story it has been a whole different story that we are working on day by day, like you and your family. There are some pictures of the children from this summer at the end of the blog.

However, so many people have asked for an update on the children that I am going to give one last update and then we will go continue working on our life story day by day, like your families.

August 25th will be three months in the United States for Joe, Oksana (what Lyda would like to be called this week) and Matthew, August 29th for Jason and myself. We have spent the last three months getting used to each other, learning what foods we like and do not like. They like almost anything that has mayonaise slathered on it. Learning about bath time and bed time, how we eat together at the table, where we keep our clothes, how not to run across a parking lot when we get out of the car. How to ride a bicycle without training wheels (Matthew), even through the yard. How to feed Murphy and Maggie and pet them "easy."

Aside - Not many people in the Ukraine had dogs as pets so they are not exactly sure how to treat them. Most of the dogs we saw on the streets were very skittish which made us think they had been abused. So, the boys had to be taught how to have a pet that you did not abuse.

How not to just eat everything you see because you see it. How to eat what you do have slowly and one at a time. Jason would cram and entire handful of goldfish in his mouth and immediately stick his hand out for more. He is much better now. That everyone who has on a uniform is not the police - firemen, deliverymen, park rangers, etc. This list goes on and on.

Someone asked me what is the thing that they have just been overwhelmed by and thought was the coolest thing ever here in America. It is really hard to tell because everything is so different from what they experienced. We went shoe shopping at Southpoint, our first trip to a mall. I thought they would just be in awe but everyone of them down to the smallest acted like they had been shopping in malls all the time, which we know they have not because nothing like our malls even remotely exist in Ukraine, even in Kiev. Then the same week I took Matthew and Oksana to the hole-in-the-wall Hillsborough Post Office and they could not stop looking at everything. So, go figure what is going to put them in awe.

They are all doing very well with their English even though Oksana will not admit it. We beat the bushes and finally found a lady from Kiev who lives in Raleigh that does English lessons. So Monday's and Wednesday's we made the trek to Raleigh for lessons. She did not speak English that well but what she could do for us was explain the words in Ukrainian so that our guys could understand and we could practice the English with them at home and in the car. "I see a ..." and "I do not see a ..." were common phrases we spent, and still do spend, a lot of time with.

In June Matthew went to camp at the Finley YMCA in Raleigh for a week and had a fantastic time. As a matter of fact, he just took his bead necklace they gave him off last night. He has worn it night and day since the camp. After camp his English was amazingly better and he has continued to improve all summer long. To the point that there have been times when he has translated to Oksana for us. We could be saying something and tell that Matthew understood but Oksana did not and he would jump in and tell her what we meant.

One of the best things I bought was a set of children's songs on CD from Walmart. On the CD's are songs that help with counting and just good ole' children's songs. We learned our ABC's (#1) and the days of the week (#20) from this as well as counting to at least ten (that's how many monkey's were in the bed).

We went to Nana Camp twice (my mom and dad's). The cousins (Ty, Megan, Paige, Madison and Lindsay) have also been there and again after these visits and playing with the cousins their language abilities just jumped. Nana has a trampoline, golfcart (which Oksana and Matthew have now learned to drive), a seemingly unlimited supply of pop-ice and tons of fun things to play with outside. The trampoline was an instant hit and both Matthew and Oksana have learned to turn a forward flip. The second time at Nana Camp we went to Sliding Rock in Pisgah National Forest and that was also a ton of fun.

Jason started day-care July 14th. I thought I would be able to tell a difference in how busy I was from day to day but I honestly could not, except that I could go to the bathroom without him marking on the door in red marker. Jason has slowed down a lot since he got here. Don't get me wrong - he is still very "busy," but now he will "play," rather than destroy, something on his own.

Matthew started Kindergarten at Leesville Elementary in July. This is his fourth week of school. His teacher's name is Mrs. Kelley and he loves her and school. He does still need to learn to use his "inside voice" during center time but is working on learning to write his letters and numbers. We decided to put Matthew in Kindergarten even though he is a little older because he needs what Kindergarten has to offer, learning to work in centers, learning to share and work with others, waiting our turn to talk, etc...

Oksana will start 7th grade at Leesville Middle School on August 25th. She is nervous about her language skills. We are too. She is going to camp at the Finley YMCA this week, today was day one, and had a terriffic time. Hopefully this week will give her some confidence with her language skills going into next week.

We also spent a great deal of time going to the doctor and dentist to get updated on our vaccinations and toothcare.

There are so many things I could tell you about the children, as I am sure those of you with children could tell about yours. Joe and I think that the children have made remarkable progress since they have been home but that the settling in process is still underway and may take a while to really be in place. Joe and I are also adjusting to having the quiet of our house shattered and think we are doing okay.

Again, Joe and I want to express our many and heartfelt thanks to those of you who have followed us on our journey with notes, e-mails, well-wishes, moral support, kind thoughts and well-wishes, clothes, gifts and gift cards. All have been greatly appreciated in helping us start our new family.

Joe and Tonya signing off

The Eastman five

2008-05-31T06:50:00.000-07:00

Tonya and Jason arrived home Friday afternoon without incident. Tonya would like to thank some very patient and very helpful flight attendants for their assistance on the 9 1/2 hour flight from Kiev. The entire Eastman family is doing well and happy to be at home together in Hillsboro. Thank you again for your thoughts, prayers, and well wishes throughout this amazing journey. Several people have posted that they are in the process of their own adoption adventure and we would like to wish you the best of luck. I am signing off of the blog. Tonya and Joe will take it from here.

God Bless,
Rachel

Coming Home!

2008-05-28T05:38:00.000-07:00

God is Good. Tonya apparently woke the Doctor up this morning at 8 a.m. and they had received info from the CDC that the negative test was acceptable for Jason to travel home.
Tonya and Jason will pick up his Visa this afternoon and be on a plane headed for NC tomorrow!

Thanks to all of you for your prayers and support throughout this amazing journey. Tonya and Joe are very appreciative. I am assuming that Tonya will update the blog after she arrives home.

Three home two to go

2008-05-27T16:28:00.000-07:00

Ok, where do I begin...

The good news. Joe, Lyda Oksana, and Mathew Dima are safe and sound in the U.S.A. We had a wonderful visit with them yesterday. Oksana is shy but warms up quickly and took immediately to Lindsay. She has a very pleasant demeanor and is very intelligent. With her English and a book for translating we were able to communicate pretty effectively. Mathew has a million dollar smile that makes you just want to hug on him. He and Madison immediately started coloring, working on puzzles, and eventually ended up outside playing tag. We had a very nice visit and are excited to have cousins that live so close.
Nothing in this process has been without incident and the trip home was no exception. Joe, Lyda, and Mathew missed the flight out of Kiev literally by 5 minutes because they needed the one piece of paperwork that they didn't have. By the time Ramon delivered it they had just closed the gate. They were able to get on a later flight out of Kiev and were told that they would still make their connection. Despite sprinting through the NY airport they missed the connection again by just 5 minutes. Turns out that Delta had actually closed the flight early so they put the Eastman's and 7 other travelers that also missed the flight up in a hotel for the night. At 5 a.m. they headed back to the airport to finish the journey home. They arrived safely at RDU on Sunday morning but no sign of the luggage. This led to the first of what I am sure will be many, trips to Wal-mart for necessities. I am confident in saying that Joe had probably never set foot in the junior girls department before, but he apparently navigated it like a pro. Oksana seemed to be very pleased with her purchases as we were admiring her new clothes during our visit. Joe said both children were troopers through the entire trip and that it was very cool to see them experience everything for the first time. Mathew was amazed at everything on the airplane right down to the tray table. Both Lyda and Mathew slept over 12 hours on Sunday night and the luggage arrived sometime in the wee hours Monday morning. All is well that ends well and we feel very blessed to have them home.

Now for Tonya and Jason Vitali,
This gets confusing but here are the facts as I understand them. My last update was that Jason had an infection that needed to be treated with penicillin. The physician at the department where the physical was conducted said that it should be 10 consecutive days of anitbiotics in the form of a shot. However, they don't administer the treatment there. Tonya and Joe tried a couple of different clinics last week that had been recommended but they were "private" clinics and wouldn't administer the treatment. Tonya had another appointment on Monday with a different physician who said that she would recommend one shot per week for three consecutive weeks but after retesting Jason to verify the diagnosis her test was negative and revealed no infection. So she contacted the physician who had done the original test and apparently after a 45 minute discussion he agreed to accept her negative result. However, he doesn't have the authority to release the records without agreement from the CDC in Atlanta. Meanwhile, we have been on a mission stateside to try and seek assistance from anyone that can possibly get the records released so that they can come home (State Department, Senators, CDC, etc....). Please pray that tomorrow will result in the release of his records. Tonya has now been in the Ukraine a really long time!!!! Imagine trying to entertain a 3 yr old in a hotel room in a foreign country where you arent' very familiar with the surroundings and you can't speak the language! On top of that, she was charging the blackberry through Joe's computer that he had to bring home with him so she doesn't even have the release that she previously had of communication through e-mail. Once again let me just say that I have nothing but the utmost respect for both Tonya and Joe. Parenting is full of sacrifices and they are truly being tested right out of the gate. We are all praying that the physician in the Ukraine will arrive to work tomorrow and see a fax from the CDC accepting the negative result and releasing the records. I will keep you posted. Never underestimate the power of prayer.

So close yet so far away

2008-05-21T18:52:00.000-07:00

I am so annoyed to have to update that with only a few days to go until the Eastman's board the plane for home there has been a minor setback. The results from Monday's medical appointment showed that Jason or little V-man as Wendy affectionatly calls him has an infection that has to be treated before he can be cleared to leave the country. The good news is that it is nothing that won't be cured with a round of antibiotics. The bad news is that it is going to require one dose per day for 10 days and it has to be administered in the Ukraine. My first reaction when I read the e-mail was "Are you kidding me? Seriously, can they not just get on the plane already and come home." But those thoughts were followed by thank the Lord that it wasn't anything more serious and what a blessing that it can be taken care of with just a round of anitbiotics.
So the new plan is that Joe, Lyda Oksana, and Mathew will return home on Saturday as scheduled. Tonya and Jason will remain in the Ukraine for at least an additional 10 days. It is hard not to be a little disappointed that they won't all be coming home together but they have made it this far and they will make it another 10 days. Please pray for safe flights home, a successful round of antibiotics, and patience for Tonya and Joe as they each attempt solo parenting for the next few days.

Have a Happy Memorial Day Weekend,
Rachel

A Good Day

2008-05-20T20:06:00.000-07:00

Things are going well in Kiev. Below are some of the e-mails from Tonya and Joe:

Monday:
Medical Appointments were fine this morning. All were tested for syphillis/HIV and because Lyda is over ten she had to get a couple of vaccinations. The actual medical check did not consist of much - a listen to the heart and lungs and a check of the lymph nodes. Planning on going to the circus on Friday night!

Tuesday:
It it 8:00 PM and so far the day has been pretty good. Boys had grits for breakfast, the instant ones I brought, and ate them like they were candy. They were actually pretty good and I wasn't expecting them to be because they were instant. Lyda on the other hand hated them and spit hers out and ran to rinse her mouth out. As an aside the boys have not had a thing put in front of them that they did not eat like it was their last meal. Probably they have some making up to do. We never saw a meal at the orphanage to know about portion control or how much they got. They have the refrigerator figured out and are constantly drinking water and juice. Since Sunday afternoon we have gone through 12 liters of water (not sure how that translates to gallons but it seems like a lot to us). Nowhere to be this morning so we slept in. That meant seven something before the little feet pitter-pattered. We actually got Lyda up at 9:30.To get out of the house we decided to go walking toward the main square. We ended up at a park near the Hyatt (Mom the one with the brass lion that you can sit on and the playthings that look like a dragon). Met a lady there from Fargo, North Dakota - also adopting, 6 1/2 year old boy. He seemed much more filled out than Matthew. (Might explain the bottomless pit.)Lunch we had at a sandwich shop on the way back to the apartment. Pretty good. When we got to the apartment it was nap time and Jason went to sleep for 1 1/2 hours. I . After nap we went to the park near the apartment and had some successful play time. The little store near us had pasta and sause (pretty good). Joe cooked the entire package of noodles and I thought he was crazy but we ate almost every bit, again, bottomless pits. Even Lyda had seconds. Jason has learned the phrase "Did Mama say no?" We practiced our bear hugs today with much success. We are thankful for many things a few follow - sippy cups, screw on caps, wipes. Lyda spent some time today talking with her friends and was in a more jovial mood this evening. She has also discovered Joe's tetris game (thanks to whoever gave that to us). The perfect ending to a good day was that Jason went to sleep tonight without so much as a wimper.

Tonya and Joe

Busy Days

2008-05-18T18:14:00.000-07:00

The Eastman's have had a busy couple of days. Yesterday they said goodbye to the ophanage and headed to Kiev. I can only imagine how hard it had to be for Oksansa to say goodbye to her friends and the familiarity of the orphanage. She is so brave and I cannot wait to meet her in person.
Below is an update from Tonya:
We went back to the ophanage on Saturday. It was a special day at the Orphanage - no school because a school group from Kiev came to do a program. We went and despite the fact that it was in Ukrainian I am pretty sure it was about the founding of Ukraine. The people at the orphanage are very nice people and are very sad to see the children go. We gave them one of the NC picture books we brought with our family picture and contact information inside and they really liked it. Everyone has - who wouldn't, we have a beautiful state.
We loaded up a very tearful Lyda Oksana, a concerned looking Matthew Dima and a pretty happy Jason Vitali. Ramon said Jason was the happiest person there he also commented that he is never still. Seems like I have heard that said about some other youngsters I know. Oksana withdrew into the corner of the van the entire way to Kiev. Matthew wanted to look at everything that he could get his eyes on, from the lining in the top of the van to every " machina" on the road. Jason played with a water bottle all the way and was pretty good in general with minimal squirming. Remember, there are no car seats or apparently the using of any safety devices by anyone here so the five of us were in the back seat of Nikolai's little Renault van. Once in Kiev - at the same apartment you and I stayed in Mom- Matthew and I went around the block to the store and got some bread, jelly (which I thought was grape but I am pretty sure now is some other berry), water and chips. I had given Oksana a taste of the peanut butter Friday night and she liked it so we lit in and made PB & J's for everyone. They all liked the "American Sandwiches". Immediately after eating (about 1:30) Lyda said it was time for the boys to sleep, took them into the room and two seconds later she was back and the boys were asleep until 5:00. Wanted to write then but left crackberry in room with sleeping children.When boys woke up Joe and I took them to a playground right at the end of the block. Good thing Mom and I had already covered all this territory so we know where everything is - including the nearest McD's which we did not eat dinner at (I want to know who won the pool). Instead we went to a pizza place that was very close (other end of the block) that Nikolai showed us when he let Mom and I out. It was like fast food pizza - high counters to sit at and no low tables so we got a couple of pizzas to go and went back to the apartment to eat. After dinner the boys played a bit and then Oksana said it wat time for a bath. We actually gave them a seudo-shower. The tub has a hand held shower nozzel, so the boys stood in the tub, Lyda soaped and I rinsed em down. I am pretty sure the boys have never experienced a tub before based on their reactions. Mom you are just going to have to imagine what that was like.
Lyda emerged from the van in Kiev much better, though it still took a while for her to really seem comfortable. She has been a fantastic help today (sandwiches, washed the dishes up - boy do I hope that impulse lasts forever-, boys naps and baths). She did spend some time today on the phone to her friends and got a text tonight from Yeva saying that she was sad and crying. Yeva and Oksana are the closest but Lasia was so upset she did not come see us leave today. I actually put a picture of Lyda and Yeva in a picture frame in her room and when she was looking at the pictures of her room on the digital camera she zoomed in on that picture right away and was very happy about it.When we get back we can fill you in on other details - which I would tell you if I was able to keep up with this thing every day - but since we have been quite busy, I have not had time.
Tomorrow is Medical Appointments and Embassy so do not expect any updates until later. Hope this has whet your appetite and gotten you caught back up pretty well. Jason only took an hour and a half to ge to sleep tonight though I am pretty sure it had to do with gas - two brand new foods to his system (peanut butter and pizza). He settled down pretty quickly after giving him a children's Pepto (thanks Ribble).

Tonz (up waaay past my bedtime)

Welcome to Parenthood!

2008-05-16T16:23:00.000-07:00

This is Rachel and it gives me the warm fuzzies to finally be able to post that Tonya and Joe have possession of the children! They left Raleigh early yesterday headed back to the Ukraine. I think they were both up at 3:15 a.m. in order to get to the airport on time. When Wendy read the e-mail below she summed it up best by replying "Welcome to parenthood".

Thanks for all the prayers! Joe, Tonya, Lyda Oksana, Mathew Dima, and Jason Vitali are all scheduled to arrive back in Raleigh next Saturday.

Here is the e-mail from Joe (When it came over is was 12:30 a.m. in the Ukraine).

"Long day without much sleep! Tonya and I arrived this morning without incident. We went straight to the orphanage to sign paperwork that we were taking custody of the kids, but the plan was that we would actually take possession on Sunday afternoon. Best laid plans...instead we took immediate possession, had dinner (all with great appetites except Oksana), took showers and donned pjs, and have spent the last 3 hours trying to coax Jason Vitali to sleep. Oksana is trying to work some magic with Tonya in the other hotel room, while I listen to Matthew Dima snooze away."

Meet The Eastmans

2008-05-04T16:35:00.000-07:00

We've posted a few pics of Lyda Oksana, Matthew Dima and Jason Vitali below. The Ukraine court confirms that we are now official parents!

More to come soon.

joe & Tonya

It Is Good To Be Home

2008-05-01T07:25:00.000-07:00

I have been home since late Monday night. My flight on Monday seemed like orphan flight. There were three couples with ten children between them that were all heading home from their adoption journey. I sat across the aisle from a man from Holly Springs who has adopted two children and was returning from a trip to get a visa for a third. While I also wished we had our three on the flight too I know that we are close to getting them here. Now that I am back in the house I cannot look around without imagining them here.

The flight was long and got even longer because of the thunderstorms heading up the east coast. We were on schedule arriving into New York before we got to start circling the airport waiting for the opportunity to land, that added an extra hour to the ten we had already been flying. On the ground I do not have much to say for the organization or efficiency of the customs process at JFK. I am sure if they would give me one day I could have them straightened out! By the time we got through we had 30 minutes before the flight to NC was to leave so we race-walked to the gate. We need not have worried because that flight was delayed too. First from 4:05 to 6:50. Then to 7:55 then back to 7:20 (which was better). Really they were not sure when we would leave because we were waiting on both pilots and flight crew. The co-pilot arrived first, then the pilot and finally a flight attendant. The plane lifted off the ground at 8:40, four hours and forty minutes after it was scheduled to. We were so happy because there were many flights that were completely cancelled.

Touched down in Raleigh at 10:05 by the time we got the luggage it was after 10:30 getting on the road home. Felt so good to be smelling NC air.

Despite having been up at that point for 25 1/2 hours there was no way I was getting in bed without washing the Ukraine off.

Didn't really sleep that late Tuesday or Wednesday. Actually today, Thursday, was the first day I really slept in. Tuesday I didn't do much of anything but wash clothes and lay on the couch. Although, I did have the Bo for breakfast, sweet tea has got to be the bes thing on earth! Tuesday I got back to normal with a trip to Wal-mart and checking some e-mails. Joe and I also had dinner with Rachel and Tadd.

Several people have asked if we are going to put pictures of the children on the blog now that they are officially ours and the answer is yes, but it will probably be this weekend before we get some time to sit down and get them on. So check back on Monday.

We plan to return to Ukraine on May 15th. My fervent hope is that it will be for about a week. Hopefully while we are here in the US new birth certificates and passports are being made and all that will be left will be medical appointments and a trip to the US EMbassy for visas for the children.

Thanks to everyone for your prayers and well wishes. They have been much needed and much appreciated. The journey is not over yet but we cannot wait to get our new ones home and settled in and have them meet all the wonderful people in our lives.

Officially Ours!!!!

2008-04-27T13:30:00.000-07:00

The ten day wait has passed with no objections so as of today Tonya and Joe are legally the parents of three beautiful children. While they aren't on the way home just yet, we all let out a big sigh of relief today. What a blessing for our entire family!
The weather has been very warm and Tonya and Mom have been making the most of the past few days trying to see the sights of Kiev. They are both headed home to the USA tomorrow. Raleigh is slated for thunderstorms so I am hoping that they don't experience any delays. Tonya and Joe will return around the 10th and we are all looking forward to the next homecoming with children in tow!

Ukranian Tourist

2008-04-24T18:50:00.000-07:00

All is well in the Ukraine. Mom is enjoying being a tourist and Tonya the tour guide. The last few days have been cold and gray but today the sun popped out and they had a beautiful day to sight see and visit the shops. Tonya has decided that since nothing more can be done until after May 9th that she will return home with Mom on Monday and then she and Joe can return together to pick up the children. They have let Oksana know the plan and told Vitali and Dima's care givers. Ramon has promised to provide updates on the children until Tonya and Joe return. While it is hard to leave the children I think that Tonya is very much looking forward to the comforts of home. Hopefully she and Joe can get rested and refreshed before they head back for round two of the Ukranian paperwork process.

Here is part of the e-mail from Mom:

We just got back from a day being tourists. Walked a lot just looking at buildings, went in two churches, walked down the Chimney Rock of Kiev. Instead of shops there are just booths along the streets. Art work, paintings and a lot of textiles. If anyone has any requests speak now. Also had tourists must haves, postcards etc. After lunch we met Ramon by chance and while chatting with him some man stopped to ask directions. Turns out that he is from Calif.

Easter in the Ukraine

2008-04-21T18:45:00.000-07:00

Joe is back home but busy catching up on things at work, things around the house, and enjoying his Mom's delicious home cooking, so I (Rachel) am resuming blogging duties for now.

From the e-mails they have sent it sounds like Mom and Tonya have had a great week visiting with the children. I think that a visit from Mom and a suitcase full of goodies from home have been very refreshing for Tonya. Her e-mails this week have been more positive and her humor has returned (at least for the moment). They have made friends and shared dinner with an Italian couple who is also there to adopt. They are both professors at a college in Milan. While hanging out at the hotel Mom decided to measure the room and reported that it was about 9 by 9.5. There are 27 inches on one side of the bed and 25 at the bottom and other side.

They have enjoyed playing outside with the boys and got some alone time with Vitali today when he was not allowed to go outside because of a slight fever. It is great to get e-mails from Mom about how all the children on the playground refer to Tonya as Vitali and Dima's Mama and how both boys generously give and receive hugs.

It is Easter in the Ukraine so they prepared Easter baskets for the children and for Oksana's friends that usually accompany her during the visits. I think that between all of them they can piece together enough English to communicate pretty well. Usually when they meet with Oksana, the girls practice saying words in English and then apparently get tickled every time Tonya or Mom try to say the words in Ukranian. Yesterday's visit was a fun break from the normal English lesson. I am going to paste an excerpt from their e-mail below:

Mom writes:
"All five girls were there and Tonya had taken there Easter goodies since we are off to Kiev tomorrow. They seemed pleased with all the chocolate but not very chatty. Then Oksana, Ula and Lila had to leave to shower and we thought the visit might be over but Oksana said stay. When they came back we were going to take a picture which led to them looking at all the pictures on our cameras, and by the way they can name almost everyone in the family from looking at Tonya's album' which led to taking more pictures. We just turned the cameras over to them and they spent a least an hour posing and snapping. A fun time was had by all. We all laughed at each others pictures and the girls were all over the hall taking pictures. When the girls were looking at the pictures in the albumeverytime there was a picture of Elizabeth they always said ohhhh Elizabeth. Babies touch hearts no matter what language or age."

Tonya Writes:
"Mom is ready to start a hosting program in NC. We are going to visit the boys in the morning and take their Easter bags. They each get a "machina", car, chocolate bunny and a couple sticks of gum. We leave for Kiev at 12. I have informed mom that it does not matter what time we arrive we will immediately be going to McDonald's. I think all the girls liked their Easter bags. Lasia ate all her candy immediately. Ula put hers in the window, but kept making frequent trips to her bag. Oksana, Yeva and Lila saved theirs. Mom has been wondering about their spiritual teachings. Ula had gotten out a bible right before we left and was reading it."

Now regarding the current timeline: Mom and Tonya are planning on heading to Kiev tomorrow so that Tonya can show Mom around the Capital for a few days before she returns home. At this point it appears that the Ukranian government will be shut down from April 26-May 4th. I think that Tonya is seriously considering flying home with Mom to catch her breath for a few days and then she and Joe will return together on or around the 5th to hopefully complete this process and come home with their children!

One funny tidbit that I have to include about Mom's plane ride over (which isn't going to surprise anyone that knows her). While on the plane Mom of course befriends the person beside her who turns out to be a Vice President for Merrill Lynch, he speaks six different languages, and his current client is the country of the Ukraine. When they got off the plane he personally escorted Mom through customs and helped her with all her paperwork.

I am not sure if Tonya will blog from Kiev tomorrow or not but one of us will keep you posted.

Joe Back to US; Peggy to Ukraine

2008-04-19T02:34:00.000-07:00

On Thursday, April 17, Joe spent the day returning to the US. On the same day, Peggy (Tonya's Mom) travelled to Kiev to soak in the Ukraine "experience" and provide a much needed familiar face to Tonya (now a Radamashel refugee).

Both Peggy and I reached our respective destinations on time and without incident - unless you count a harrowing 20 minutes that I spent looking for my passport when passing through US customs (the passport had fallen into a virtually hidden and inaccessible section of my carry-on bag).

I am now enjoying western food and a soft bed - and feel more than a little guilty that Tonya is not here to share them with me! I will just have to endure the guilt pangs and put on a happy face...

Here are a few recent communications from Tonya and Peggy:

April 18 - 1st Mom Visit

Just back from visit with boys. They are very handsome young men and cute kids. Very excited to see Tonya. We spent the time outside, Matthew Dima and I played with the soccer ball and Ty will be happy to know that he loved kicking the soccer ball. Everything seems to make him happy and his laugh is contagious. Wendy will be happy to know that both give and receive big hugs. Jason Vitali is very curious about everything and going to need a nice sand box. We also will need a bike for Matthew Dima.

Basically what Mom is saying is that they will need everything. We came away with tracings of feet that Mom will bring back with her. Matthew Dima's cloths are "medium" - not sure if this is American medium or something else. One of the little girls had on the purple camouflage "My Little Pony" outfit we had left at the orphanage the other day. Mom also got to meet Lyda Oksana and a few of her friends (Yeva, Lesia and Eula) when they were outside on a break between classes. We saw a notebook where Lyda Oksana had been practicing her English. The funny thing is that the phrases were written in Cyrillic and she said them aloud in English. We are going to go back again this afternoon to see her again. Debbie cakes were a big hit with the boys as were the "machinas" (hot wheels cars) as Matthew Dima calls them. Mom also got to meet the orphanage Director and to see one of Jason Vitali's fits (complete with foot stomping and lots of noise) when we were headed back in. Hope everyone has a good day - very nice but windy here today. Tonz and Mom

April 19 - Saturday With The Boys

Good morning. We have already visited the boys this morning - they get so excited when they see Tonya. All the other children say "Dima, Vitali Mama." Fun to watch. Matthew Dima practiced writing again. He used the ABC book and copied from it. He is very neat and shows Mama everything he does. Proud of his work and likes the praise. Jason Vitali spent most of his time playing in the sand. He likes to dig in the dirt so may be a good gardening partner. I try to look at the houses as we pass but it is very hard. Do not want to be staring too long but there is a lot of detail to look at. Some places are old but some are new or remodeled. Same with the cars and scooters. And we have seen several horses pulling wagons. A blending of the old and new. Despite the warmth of the day they still bundle the boys up like it is freezing cold outside. RR (Radamashel refugees)

That's all for now. Send all good thoughts to Tonya and Peggy. I will monitor the Radamashel chatter and try to update the blog daily.

Joe

Let the Waiting Begin (Continue)

2008-04-17T06:27:00.000-07:00

Below is the update from Tonya. It goes into a little more detail than I did yesterday. I have been sending Tonya and Joe e-mail's about how this experience parallels being on the TV show "Survivor". Well this episode is the one where you receive the visit from a loved one at home. Mom will arrive in Kiev today and Joe's mom is picking him up from the airport today, so both will get their much needed hug from home. The thing that continues to amaze me about this process as I read other peoples blogs and journeys, is that every experience is somewhat unique. We can't wait to welcome home the new additions to our family, but I think we all had ideas in our heads that this process would be a little more "warm and fuzzy" than it has turned out to be.

I just checked the flights and Mom's plane has touched down and she should be at the gate! Here is Tonya's update.

" So, as I have some airport time to kill (it is 12:45 and we got here at 8:00, mom gets here at 4:15 - the time is going surprisingly fast) I thought I would update the blog info. I wrote 12 pages in my journal about yesterday but I will try to keep it a little shorter for this.

I think the appropriate title for this is "Let the Waiting Begin (Continue)"

So, we had court yesterday ( Aprill 16th) among other things. All in all a pretty full day.

Court was scheduled for 1:00. Ramon came to Radamashel about. 9:00 to go to the Inspector's office because he needed to get official stamps on some copies of paperwork that the SDA requested. This is paperwork that the SDA does not normally request - but remember Joe and I are not doing this the easy way, that is not our way. This will become even more evident later on. Anyway we basically only got to keep our court date yesterday because Ramon promised to bring the officially stamped copies back to the SDA the same afternoon - 9:00 today is when he actually got them to the SDA as he did not leave Radamashel until almost 7 last night.

So court...

We get to the court - I will have Joe post a picture of the building as well as the courtroom - a little before 1. The other participants arrive shortly after - Inspector (I) and the Orphanage Representative (OR), thr Director' second in command. My fvorite thing about the entire court experience is that the Judge was running around in her slippers (pink!). She was appropriately robed and shod when court started.

Courtroom does not seem to be a busy place as the room was opened specifically for our hearing and closed again afterwards. (You just have to see the picture). They did not even turn the lights on.

Entire court presence:
Joe, myself and Ramon
Inspector
Orphanage Representative
Court Recorder - pencil and paper, no machines here
Judge and 2 other court witnesses
Town Prosecutor

Before setting out for court we asked Ramon what kinds of questions we would be asked and he said none really because this is just a formality. He wasn't exactly correct - I refer back to the difficult way!

When the procedings started there was a lot of reading by the judge of required documents, people present (each of us - including the I and OR - had to stand and identify ourselves and say our birthdays), our rights as petitioners, and other stuff like that. Then the judge says there will be a few questions - 20 minutes later we moved on. The questions ranged from "how many rooms do you have in your house?" to "Will you be able to give these children the love they need?" There were plenty more and if I was not typing this on Joe's blackberry at the airport I would type more.

Aside: I just spent the last hour at the internet cafe in the airport trying to use my school e-mail to send the message instead of the crackberry. Pretty much all I could do was look at messages and delete some - sending did not work. There is something about Wake Counties e-mailsystem that is very difficult to use out of town.

The I and OR then gave their statements approving the adoption petition. There ws some more reading of stuff and then the judge says they will be going out to debate for 15 - 20 minutes. 15-20 minutes later they were back and the judge starts to read a two page, front and back statement, word for word that basically says says the court approves the petition and now we have to wait for 10 days to see if anyone objects. Court adjourned.

Ramon wanted to say a few follow-up words to the judge just to get clear when we could pick up the paperwork and where the new birth certificates need to be made. when he is finished it is now 3:30. Our 20 minute court date took two and a half hours.

We now head to the orphanage to see the Director. Of course she was not there - so 15-20 minutes more waiting. (Ramon has told us that Ukrainians are good at waiting because during the Soviet occupation they had to wait in line for everything) Director was in a very chatty mood. I will not bore you with those details but it was after five when we left.

It is at this point that my anger for the day really takes off. Ramon tells us that he is still waiting to hear about our apartment in Kiev. Why are we still waiting? Why wasn't the apartment booked last week when we told you we were going to need it on Wednesday.

I will skip all the sordid details, but in the end we stayed in Radamashel because there were no hotel rooms or apartments available in the entire city of Kiev. You all know my penchant for having a plan and making preparations ahead of time. So, when the men (sorry men for the stereotyping but this is such a man thing to do) do not try to get an apartment until the day of this is what happens. So, Joe and I leave Radamashel with Nikolai at 6AM to get him to the airport because he is going home for a week or so and mom is taking his place.

Here comes thing two that almost puts me over the edge.

While we are waiting to hear about the apartment we go over the timeline for the next set of paperwork. We have to wait ten days, that is April 26th a Saturday, so we have to wait until Monday to pick up the paperwork, but the 28th is Easter here so Monday is a holiday (no problem the same is true in the US). But, May 1st is a holiday similar to Labor Day (only a much bigger deal here) and the little town we have to get the birth certificates issued in, something like Karastachif, may be closed the entire week. WHAT! So the next day that we could get anything done would be May 5th! WHAT!!!!!

The agency may be open on the 28th and 29th but Ramon does not know that (he is suposed to be finding out today, haven't heard from him yet) and if they are he does not know if they will be able to do the new certificates in two days before they go on vacation until the next week. GOOD GRIEF!

I am trying not to borrow trouble but today is day 40 here and I am ready to get back in touch with my life. I am aware that we will be coming home with three great children and that is the most important thing.

Random Observations:
- the airport is seriously busy and has not slowed down since I got here at 8AM. They could stand for an expansion

- I had a surprisingly good - if not salty lunch at the airport

- the majority of men here carry "man bags" - yes, very much like Joey's on "Friends"

- everyone even if they have a purse or "man bag" carries a plastic shoping type bag. You can buy them at street vendors and "Hugo Boss" is a very popular style. Also seeing a lot of flower covered ones now that the weather is a bit warmer. Joe and I are perplexed by these bags and neither of us has taken up the habit- although we did look at "man bags" for Joe!

Hope this satisfies everyone's craving for an update. I am going to go get a soft serve ice cream. A lot of that is sold here as well and you can get a cone at McDonald's for 1.50 hriyvna which is about thirty cents - pretty good deal. Wonder how much they are here.

3:00, only an hour and a half to go. Mom is almost here."

Tonz

Day in Court

2008-04-16T18:33:00.000-07:00

Sorry to post so late tonight, I was hoping to get an e-mail update from Tonya and Joe but they have had a very long day so that will have to wait until tomorrow. I did speak with them on the phone this afternoon so here is a brief summary.

The great news is that they did get their court appointment (thanks for the prayers) and everything was signed, approved, etc....so now the 10 day wait begins. They also had a very good conversation with the director at the orphanage. Tonya said she was the nicest and chattiest that she has been yet. I am not sure if they got to see the boys today but did say they had a nice visit with Oksana. Mom's plane left on time today so she is well on her way and should arrive in the Ukraine tomorrow at 5 their time.

Now for what is becoming the typical Ukranian twist (I am going to give the short version and hopefully Tonya and Joe can fill in the gaps): they were in court at 1 p.m. and the appointment lasted for over 3 hours then they had to go and wait for the director at the orphanage for over 45 minutes because they needed her signature. The entire time they were planning on returning to Kiev so that Joe could catch his flight out tomorrow. After they left the director they were informed that the reservation they had requested for an apartment in Kiev had never been made. Ramon called this afternoon but there is a conference in Kiev and as a result there are no apartments or hotels in the entire city. So, Tonya and Joe had to spend an extra night in Radamashel, and they are leaving at 6a.m. headed back to Kiev so that Joe can catch his plane. Tonya is going to hang around the airport until Mom lands at 5 and then they are headed back to Radamashel until at least Tuesday. Mom is very excited to see the kids so I am sure that will help her overcome her jetlag.

The 10 day wait has now started and that includes weekends. However, Tonya and Joe's 10 days will end on a Saturday which pushes it to Monday. That happens to be Easter weekend in the Ukraine so Monday is a holiday, so that pushes it until Tuesday. Ramon said that sometimes they take the entire week off for the holiday but he is not sure if that is the case this year or not. He will try to find out tomorrow but that decision can change daily so there is really no way to be sure if they will work that week or not. If they don't, that turns the 10 day wait into 19 days. The kicker is that this time has to pass before they can start the paperwork for passports, birth certificates, etc...

Today's prayer request is for safe flights for Mom and Joe and that whoever is in charge of the paperwork will decide to come to work on the Tuesday after Easter so they can move on with the next step of this process.

Thanks,
Rachel

Pray for paperwork

2008-04-15T10:19:00.000-07:00

It seems like as Tonya and Joe move through this process the focus of our prayers change almost daily: safe travel, get a referral, healthy children, good visit with the director, edible food, etc...... so today's focus is getting the paperwork signed so that they can make their court date. Wednesday the prayer request will change again to safe travel for Mom and Joe as they trade places and that the 10 day waiting period passes without incident. Thanks for all the prayers, please keep them up, they are working!
Here is today's update from the Ukraine:

"Just back from visiting with Oksana. We practiced English and Ukrainian today. Yeva and Lasia were there as well.

Visited with the boys this morning. They like to play in the sandbox. We held up some of the clothes to try and get a size estimate. Dima - the 4-5 pants look to be right for him as well as the 4T shirt. He is probably right in the middle of the two. Vitali - the 3T pants were way too long but the 2T looked like he was about to be too big for them. The 3T shirt was a little big but the 2T was definitely too small. So, we are pretty much between sizes. Will probably not be able to tell for sure until we are able to actually get the clothes on them.

Ramon says we are on for court tomorrow at one and he is 90% sure the paperwork will be done. When we talked to him this afternoon he was waiting for them to call and tell him they had been signed.

As an aside it seems that the people who do the preparing of the documents and the people who do the signing are not the same, and the people who do the signing are never around. We needed the Inspector to sign so we could visit the children - not around. We needed the Notary to sign so we could submit documents to Inspector - not around. We need the SDA to sign - not around.Hopefully they will get signed so we do not have to change our tickets or figure out how to get mom.

Hope your day is good.

Tonz and Yo"

Back in Radamashal

2008-04-14T11:27:00.000-07:00

Tonya and Joe are back in Radamashal so I have resumed blogging duties for the next few days. We had a great time getting the rooms ready over the weekend and cannot wait for our neice and nephews to see them. Mom is preparing to trade places with Joe for 2 weeks so he can come home and refresh, work, etc.. She is very excited and a little anxious about navigating the international airports by herself. She is so brave and adventurous, I am sure that Oxanna, Dima, and Vitali will love her instantly. Since Operation American Junkfood was kidnapped by customs we are attempting once again to get food to Tonya via Mom's suitcase. We are also sending fresh reading material and repleneshing all the toiletries (the travel sizes have all run out). As you can see from the update below all the delay's are really starting to wear on Tonya's nerves. It now looks like they will not make it home even in early May. Two months is a long time to be away from home no matter what the location. Here is Today's update:

"Of course the SDA does not have the paperwork ready today...so, we wait until tomorrow and hope that Ramon can get our court date rescheduled for Wednesday.On another front the couple from Spain (Pila and Fernando), that did not arrive in Ukraine until March 20th compared to our arrival date of March 8th, has their court date on Wednesday. I cannot express the amount of unhappy I am going to be if a couple who started after us ends up "ahead". While I will really be glad that the process has gone quickly for them I may have to vent to someone about why things seem to be taking the slow path for us.Since we are going to miss the NC Primary I am thinking of running for office here. Or maybe I will just open a business to show people how to be more efficient and organized. I am pretty sure that even with my limited computer skills I can teach them a thing or two. As my students can attest I have some serious experience with graphic organizers.Had a fantastic visit with the boys this morning. The entire class was getting ready to go outside so we helped get shoes and coats on and everyone went out. Pila and Fernando were also there, visiting Misha (Miguel) and when the children saw that we all had ballons and bubbles it was like the hounds after the fox. You could hardly see Pila, Fernando and Joe for the crowds of children around them (there are 18 children in the class) trying to get a balloon blown up or a bottle of bubbles. As I was not the dissemenator of any of the above mentioned items I actually did more watching and refereeing than actual work. The pandemonium lasted about 15 minutes until balloons were blowing all over the playground and hundreds of bubbles had been blown and some of the children began to drift off to other pursuits.We stayed outside as long as they did, from about 10:30 to 12. The children are just so cute and in need of attention that you just want to be able to help them all. (They all recognize us as Dima and Vitali's mama and papa.) We have already had this same conversation about Oksana's friends (Lasia, Yeva and Ula). Of course we do not know their situations, but we do know the longer they stay in an orphanage the worse their future options are.You could tell the teacher was glad to have four adults to distract the children because she sat off to the side and talked on her cell phone pretty much the entire time. It is also clear the children have a routine and they follow it like little robots. When it was time to go in they all gathered around the teacher, walked in an orderly group (no stragglers or children running ahead). When they got back inside as soon as they got inside the door the coats, hats and shoes came off. Coats and hats were hung up on little hooks along the wall and little slippers were put on - before anyone went to do anything else. Rachel asked at one point if there was just a big box of hats that they grabbed out of because Vitali has had on a different hat in every picture (sorry, but family members have been sent some pictures), and while there is no box per-se there does seem to be the practice of grabbing whatever hat is handy however, Dima has worn the same hat every time and they both seem to wear the same coats from visit to visit.Did not see Oksana today because of some conferences involving school. But we will see her tomorrow."

Tonz and Joe

Another Weekend In Kiev

2008-04-12T09:45:00.000-07:00

If it were not for the fact that we are in Kiev the last few days would have been very much like we were at home (except for the food, bed, cars on the sidewalks and cigarette smoke everywhere). We have washed clothes, gone to the bank, eaten at McDonald's (conservatively 5 times in four days - we do not eat there that much at home despite what my family thinks), stocked up at the grocery store (pretty much all candy - Mounds (called "Bounty" here), yummy little cake rolls with jam inside and chocolate outside, gummi bears for Joe and the ever present Banaqua (no gas). We also did some randon shopping and took a hike through the city. Our walk was really nice. We went by Dynamo Stadium (local soccer team) who, as we were informed by a street vendor today are not very good, by Marinsky Palace (currently being restored and it was still beautiful), Parliament, a monstrous government building, the National Art Museum (spent a wonderful hour there for only two bucks) and finished up with a walk in the park overlooking the Dnipro River.

Now that I have read all my books and we are finishing up the last few crosswords I pulled out the Sudoku book and Joe (who claims not to like puzzles) was instantly addicted. Thank goodness mom gave us the Fast and Easy book because I am pretty sure we spent about 1 1/2 hours to do the first puzzle. I hope these get easier or our egos might be bruised.

Tomorrow we head back to Radamashel with our hopes of being home in the early single digits of May dashed. The new birth certificates and passports are going to slow us up. Here's where the schedule stands (I have only looked at the calendar about a million times in the last few days).

- Monday pick up papers from SDA (2:00 - very popular time to pick things up here)
- Tuesday court appointment 10:40
- Let the 10 days of waiting begin. - This is where the process really slows down. NO OTHER PAPERWORK CAN BE DONE DURING THIS TEN DAYS!!! Aaaaaargh!
- April 28th - adoption is almost official - take papers to get new birth certificates - 2-3 days
- New Passports 5-7 days
- Medical Appointment Kiev
- US Embassy - Kiev
- Get the heck out of dodge on the first plan out of here - not fast enough!!

Conservatively depending on how fast/slow the passports are we could be here 60 - 62 days.

On the good side, however, Joe will be coming home this Thursday, April 17th for about 10 days. Mom is trading places with him to keep me company while he is gone and see some of the sights. We are very excited that Joe will get to go home - food, bed, food, pets, food, couch, food... you get the picture.

He can also check out the decorating that our families did to the children's room's this weekend. Apparently there was a blitzkrieg on the rooms (Mom's (both Joe and Tonya), Wendy, Rachel, Tammy, assorted spouses and children). Rumor has it beds were assembeled, sheets and linens bought and some minor accessorizing done. It cannot be said enough the blessings a fantastic and loving family bring - not to mention plenty of manual labor. Thanks guys!

Random Toughts:
- One would think that with the advent of warmer weather that the knee/thigh high black stiletto boots would be tucked away, for your normal run of the mill stilettos, but no - who knew that they also look great with mini-skirts and shorts.

- I know some folks who would find this next bit welcome news but apparently no time of day (morning, noon or night) is a bad time to have a beer. We read that they are pretty much in the same category as soft drinks and you are allowed to drink them here on the street. We see people carrying a beer more often that soft drinks. Saw someone drinking one this morning about 9AM. We had a conversation about beer with one of our drivers and told him that in America the drinking age is 21. His question/comment was, "What do the children drink?!" We thought this was rather funny and telling.

Will turn blogging duties back over to Rachel for a few days. Thanks again for all the comments and well-wishes.

Tonya & Joe

Again in Kiev

2008-04-10T01:05:00.000-07:00

Just want to remind everyone that we are not posting pictures of the children until all is completely official.

We have come back to Kiev to get some food. Really if it weren't for the food issue we could stay in Radamashel. Except for a few specific food categories, fish or pretty much anything that lives in water, I never really considered myself to be a picky eater and Joe seems to be less picky than me. However, this trip has shown that if not picky we are definitely not adventerous eaters. As the Ukrainian menu consists of a lot of sausage type meats (not hardly any chicken or pork, lots of dishes made with liver and a disturbing penchant for eating fat - yes folks fat, processed into a square form and cut off in pieces fat - the menu at our hotel is pretty limited. There are about five dishes that we keep eating over and over (chicken soup - mostly little chicken and lots of soup), slaw, potatoes (mashed and fried), fish with vegetables and a Greek Salad that is actually very good but that they have only when they are able to get tomatoes. So, despite the fact that coming back to the city brings us away from the children for a few days it is necessary for our health to get something different in our bodies, even if it is McDonald's. This is "extreme" dieting that I do not really recommend to the general population. Joe has lost about 10 pounds and I am down 5-7. These are general estimates based on how the clothes are starting to fit.

We included several pictures of the places we have been eating in Kiev and the hotel restaurant in Radamashel as well as the grocery store near the apartment. Juice here comes in the containers like the apple juice and "Sandora" is the most popular brand. Lots of people drink water and the most common is "Bonaqua". It comes in two kinds - with gas and without. "With gas" means carbonated, which Joe likes and has a dark blue lid. I like "without", which has the light blue lid pictured. I started carrying a lid with me to show people who might not understand our English very well. It has worked very effectively.

The children are doing well. I saw that Rachel had posted the information about Vitali's penchant for having fits. Thankfully the next couple of days passed without incident. We are confident that much of this behavior comes from being in a room with 18 other children and there being an almost "survival of the fittest" mentality about anything you want to play with.

We are very anxious to be home and back in contact with our lives (bed, food, family, friends, pets, etc). Traveling outside the US definitely makes you appreciate everything our country has to offer. The process continues on and for every step closer we get it seems there is more to be done. After the court date the children will get new birth certificates and passports, a medical exam and a trip to the US Embassy. Of course all theses steps are allowed up to 10 days. Thanks to Ramon, our coordinator, many of these steps have gone much faster so we still hold out hope of being home in the early single digits of May. A lot longer than our original estimate of April 17 but less than it could have been, and we will be returning with three lovely children.

Just found out while we are typing on the blog that Operation American Junk Food has been delayed at Customs for days because food is not allowed to be sent into the country. They will open the boxes tomorrow (not sure why today is not an option since it is still before lunch here but whatever) and take out the Debbies and any other food Wendy may have included. It is possible we will receive these packages before we leave the country. I do know that someone in the Customs Warehouse is going to be enjoying Debbie Cakes for days to come.

Other Random Observations:
- I love the way people drive here - wide open everywhere they go. Surprisingly few wrecks. But, what I really like is that they get over. If someone is coming up behind them they get out of the way. They also have the whole take-gap-give-gap thing down pat. There are very few traffic backups for things like the road crew painting the fencing in the middle of the road because people just merge over and keep the pedal to the metal.

- Have included a picture of the sidewalk parking that goes on. This is pretty much standard all over the city and you do need to watch out for cars driving to their parking space on the sidewalk. We have noticed that there really aren't any parking lots, the one at McDonald's is the only one we have seen, and no parking decks. Our est guess is that not that many people had cars during Soviet Occupation and now that capitalism has set in and more folks can afford one there is no where to park. This is only going to get worse before it gets better.

- Nothing works efficiently. Democracy is a painful process and we feel like we are caught in the middle with all the paperwork that we have to have done.

- Sorry to hear about our Heels but strangely we did get to watch the National Championship Game the day after it happened. We were waiting on Ramon to pickup some paperwork and found it on one of the channels at the hotel - commentated in Ukraininan of course. Did not matter - it wasn't soccer, which we could see 24-7 if we wanted to (sorry Paul!) - and it was a good game. We are glad Kansas won.

- Note the squirrel picture - fuzzy ears. We like them.

- There are huge stork nests in one of the villages we pass through on the way to Radamashel and the last time we came by there were huge storks in them (no pictures yet)which is really cool to see.

Thanks again for all the support. We miss everyone and the familiarity of home and your notes and comments help provide that connection.

Tonya & Joe

Back in Kiev

2008-04-09T16:02:00.000-07:00

I didn't post yeserday because I thought that Tonya and Joe would be back in Kiev in time to update. They did arrive back in Kiev but not in time to get settled and then venture out to find internet access. To bad they can't get on the internet at their new favorite place, McDonalds. So I am providing one more update for them and then they should be able to post tomorrow. Below is their e-mial:

"We are finally back in Kiev and BigMacs have been injested. We feel like people who have been deprived of food for so long that we need to be careful what we eat- except that we tore right into our Macs and didn't look back. So far the only side effect is that happy feeling from having a full stomach and from having eaten something different than slaw, mashed potatoes or chicken soup for the last seven days!

We have begun describing Radamushel in terms of towns in horror movies that just will not let you leave - where you drive and drive and when you turn the corner you are back in the same town. We were going to come back to Kiev Friday, but because the paperwork was going to be finished yesterday we stayed the weekend. Then it did not get finished and we had to stay Monday night. Today we thought we would be leaving by 12 and it was 3. Then we got all our stuff (just barely) in a cab and started heading out and he found out exactly where we were going and did not want to go there so he lierally drove around the block - and we took our stuff back out of the cab right back in front of the hotel. We had better luck with the second guy although he did abruptly stop at the last building before leaving town, causing us to wonder what the deal was, but he came back out with a Coke and off we went.

We are happily ensconced back in Apartment #44 (our favorite - even the apartment owner was glad to see us back and remembered our names). This is our third time in this building and second time in #44. We are actually going to try and get it when we come back with the kids. We have happily been roaming around the apartment - it is like the Biltmore compared to our hotel room."

Tonz and Yo

One more day

2008-04-07T08:56:00.000-07:00

Looks like one more day before the return to Kiev. The good news is that UPS tracking shows that Operation American Junkfood landed in Kiev at 3 a.m. and just needs to clear customs. Hopefully it will be waiting for them when they arrive tomorrow.

E-mail from Tonya and Joe:

"Boo! No Kiev today. The Inspector will be finished completing the paperwork but there are still some reviews, signatures and going to the judge to be done.

Joe and I actually did not do much today. Ramon said he would be here at 9 today, and he was, just not at the hotel - at the Inspectors office. So the busy day was actually Ramon's busy day. We spent the day very much like we have spent the last several days - doing nothing.

So another night of BigMac dreams.

We did not even visit the children because we thought we would be busy doing stuff. I think it is safe to say we are tired of being in this town - more specifically in this room, and not just beause of the food. If there is such a thing as too much laying around we are doing it - and this is coming from a professional layer arounder. We are not straying from our appointed path to the orphanage because where Kiev is used to foreigners this town is not and it is better to be safe than sorry. So we pretty much stay at the hotel when we are not visiting the children. I'm Kiev we are out every day walking to eat or going to see something.We pretty much saw everything this town has the first 10 minutes we were here.

Ready to be done!"

Tonz and Yo

Sad Day for the TarHeels

2008-04-06T19:01:00.000-07:00

Thank goodness Tonya and Joe were not here to watch the ever so painful loss to Kansas last night. Seriously, 40-12 after 10 minutes....oh it was hard to watch. On top of that I had to break it to them that Jeff Gordon crashed out around lap 109 of the race. Not a good weekend for sports fans around the Eastman household. At least all was well in the Ukraine over the weekend. Below is the post from Tonya and Joe. Unless plans change they will update us tomorrow from Kiev.

"We had a better visit with the boys this morning. We managed to make it back inside without having any fits. Vitali did try his pretend fit having noises at one point while we were playing and we just ignored him and started playing something else. He saw we were not even giving him attention and finally stopped making noise and started playing with us.

Found out yesterday that there is another couple from Italy visiting a child or children, we do not know which, at our orphanage. It seems like there has been no one there for two years and now there are three couples (America, Spain and Italy) at one time.

Ramon comes at nine in the morning and we will have a full day of paperwork that will hopefully culminate in us eating dinner at McDonald's in Kiev."

Tonya and Joe

Official Okay!!!

2008-04-04T14:18:00.000-07:00

Even though I probably won't be able to let out a true sigh of relief until I see them touch down at RDU, I find myself getting excited when they say things like "the director has given the official okay". Tonya said that the director told them that she could tell by looking at them that they would be good parents and that she liked the size of their family and the fact that there would be other children around. I knew that being herd bound would prove as an advantage at some point. Tonya and Joe were originally heading back to Kiev today but with the new paperwork developments they won't be going until Monday. Poor Joe's only comment about not going to Kiev tonight was, "We are not having McDonald's for dinner." Hopefully Operation American Junk food will find it's way to them on Monday and they should have enough food to sustain them for the rest of the trip. For those of you keeping score at home, according to Tonya's timeline they hopefully will be home by the end of April or in early May!
A few people have requested pictures. Tonya and Joe were advised not to post any on the blog until the adoption was official. The boys are very cute with short blonde hair. Oksana is very pretty and has shoulder length brown hair.

Below is today's update from Tonya and Joe. Have a great Friday -Rachel

"We have just returned from our meeting with the Orphanage Director and have been given the official okay. The paperwork has been signed by her and turned over to the Inspector.

The Inspector will have the papers ready on Monday at 2:00 (at least a day ahead of time - YAHOO!) - so we are going to stay here for the next two days and then go back to Kiev Monday.

Ramon wil return at 9:00 Monday - we will have copies of documents to make and a couple of things to get notorized and a petition to the court to get. Then we will pick up the documents, set a court date and then return to Kiev for a few days.

It is hard to maintain patience and not count the days down until we can return home. I have my calendar handy and every time we get news of shorter days I refigure when we can go home. Although we have had our last period of shorter days - the SDA will take five and we have to wait ten after the court date.

Will spend the weekend visiting and will let you know how things go. For good or bad someone had better let me know how our Heels do tonight."

Tonz and Yo

Second Visit Alone

2008-04-03T07:24:00.000-07:00

We anxiously await our boxes of goodies, we haven't gotten them and we are already salivating. Thank you or as the Cyrillic is pronounced in English dya-ku-yu.

We had our second visit with the boys this morning. We tried to show them the house pictures but they were not really interested. We then went to the part of the playground more appropriate for little folks like Vitali. Dima did not have as much to do in this area and pretty soon started climbing on things (he loves to climb) that Vitali could not do. So of course Vitali wanted to do everything Dima did. All actually went pretty well until it was time to go back in. Vitali did not want to go had to be picked up whereupon he commenced screaming and thrashing around and stiffening up like a board. This was pleasant. I carried him for a bit like this and then put him down so he could walk - which he did very slowly. Again all was well until we passed the entrance for the larger playground and he wanted to go in. Joe had to pick him up and we had the same fit all over again. Before we actually made it back in the building he had actually lain down on the ground and kicked around.

So we returned him to his room still making a lot of noise, but not actually crying. He never really cried just made a lot of noise - it seems making a lot of noise when he wants something has worked in the past- he is in for a rude awakening.

He and Dima are just far enough apart in age that Dima does not really want to play with him yet at the same time Vitali wants to do everything Dima does, even though he is too small. Remind you of anyone?

Second visit with Oksana went as well as the first. We were practicing our ages and found out we had done our math improperly and she is actually 13. Her birthday and Vitali's are both in February.

Oksana - Feb. 9, 1995
Dima - Oct. 19, 2001
Vitali - Feb. 23, 2005

One correction from yesterday, it was Ula not Ulana. Today we had Yeva and Lasia and we practiced lots of things - clothes, colors, face and head parts, numbers to 20 and ages. We told them the English and they told us the Ukrainian. Some of them sound exactly the same like nose is nis, and some are completely different. It is a goood learning experience for all.

We are going to return to Kiev this weekend but it will not be until tomorrow night so maybe we can get to the internet on Saturday.

Love to All,
Tonz and Yo

Operation American Junk Food

2008-04-02T14:24:00.000-07:00

After several days of badgering Tonya and Joe finally relented and gave Wendy an address to mail a care package. After all their grumbling about the food you think they would have given her one eagerly, but it took badgering. I think Wendy summed it up perfectly:
"Cost of little debbie cakes: $1.99, cost to ship little debbie cakes internationally: considerably more than that,
Adding bundles of joy to our family by hook or by crook: PRICELESS!!!!"

Below is today's update from Tonya and Joe:

We had good visits with the children. Today we had our first day with the children without our interpreter (Ramon). We saw the boys this morning and they basically just ran around and played. When we met with Oksana this afternoon I think everyone was nervous. Oksana was smart and had brought a friend along, Ulana, who new just a tad bit more English than Oksana. So all in all we got by pretty well. We were able to practice some English with Oksana and Joe and I practiced our Ukrainian. There are a few things we are getting pretty good at. Ramon said that several of the people we have met are happy that we have learned some Ukrainian. How could we not - it is a matter of needing to get by (ie. Eat!)

For example: apple juice ya-bluch-ne seek

We met a couple from Madrid today visiting a three year old, here at the same orphanage, and his six year old brother in an orphanage 80 kilometers away. Apparently the brothers have never met each other. Very nice couple. They knew just enough English and we knew just enough Spanish. We did not ask but this must be their first referral because they have only been here since March 20th. I am sure we will see them again because they are visiting here in the mornings and at the other orphanage in the afternoon. They also made a comment about how long the papwework takes here compared to at the other orphanage. I did not mention that we were hoping our paperwork would be done faster.

I think that no matter what country you come from you get the same information about what to bring. They had exactly the same things we did - coloring book and crayons, balloons, bubbles, stickers, etc. Funny-

I think I said in an earlier e-mail that we had sent half of our orphanage donation with Ramon yesterday, but the Director would not accept it. That's fine with me as long as the paperwork still gets done by Friday!

Hope this was a good update for today. We are getting ready to go eat dinner. Hope eveyone has a good day.

Random Observations -
- gold teeth are not just for rappers - we have seen some people with a mouth full. They are probably a status sign.
- people here seem to be hopeful that their country will get better soon
- I did not think I was a picky eater but I have found that I am not an adventurous (?) eater
- we like that almost everyone here who has their own house with even a little land has their own garden (even if the garden is small). Lots of people have been out working one theirs the last couple of days.

Tonz and Yo

Tenative Timeline

2008-04-01T05:50:00.000-07:00

Rachel posting again since Tonya and Joe have returned to "no name destination" which they have finally identified as Radamashel. I informed Tonya that while I understand the annoyance of typing more than five words at a time on the crackberry, inquiring minds want to know what is going on, so I need details. She seems to have listened because she has sent me some good info regarding the tenative process moving forward. Below is her e-mail. They have stated many times in e-mails to me that they can feel the support and love coming from home and that really helps. So thanks again for lifting them up.

Excellent news! Ramon is a magic man.
He is back from his meeting with the Inspector and the Director and here is the tentative plan going forward. The school will be ready with the documents THIS Friday. Friday we have a meeting with the Director at 2:00 to pick them up. We will then go to have a couple of documents notarized and turn the papers over to the Inspector who will have their papers ready next Tuesday or Wednesday. At that time we will meet with the judge and set up a court date. The documents will then be taken back to Kiev to the SDA. They will need five days (no speeding them up) to do their part with the documents. The day we return to Radamashel we will have our court date. Next comes the mandatoy 10 day waiting period. Then we will pickup the children go back to Kiev for 3-4 days for medical appointments and to go to the US Embassy.
Then we can get th heck out of dodge!

We saw storks this morning on our way to Radamashel. They have these huge nests on top of poles (kind of like the platforms we saw for the bald eagles in Canada) near little groups of houses. Last week there were no birds in the nests but this morning quite a few were occupied. No pictures of that yet but we may still be able to get some.
We also have found out that they have hedgehogs here. I would love to see one of those - but they are kind of like prarie dogs and gophers in that they live in burrows underground.

We are off to visit the children now. Will check back in with you later.
Tonz & Joe

Gifts and Stuff

2008-03-31T11:21:00.000-07:00

I realized today that we haven't said anything about the gifts we brought for the children and how they went over. Let's just say that all the gifts we packed were not intended to be for twelve-year old girls.

So, for our very first visit we took puppy coloring books and crayons for the boys. Dima colored like a champ - very carefully coloring the entire picture and staying inside the lines. He has definitely had coloring experience. Vitali, in three year old fashion, colored some scribbles on every page. We gave Oksana a bath set that Rachel had picked up as a gift at some PSS function and one of the puppy coloring books. All seemed to go over well.

For the next several visits we took balloons. We had bought probably a hundred balloons at Party City and on the advice of Phil and Robin Hammond this little gadget to blow up the balloons. Boy, I cannot tell you what a hit both of those have been. We have already gone through one entire pack of balloons. The thing is once a balloon is blown up they just want to blow up another. There is not that much playing with the balloons as there is blowing up one balloon after another. The balloon blower upper is maybe the biggest hit (thanks Phil and Robin for that great tip), the boys love to just blow up the balloons. Dima has gotten pretty creative with his balloons - tying them together and wrapping them around each other to make these great ballooon globs. Vitali just wants whatever Dima has.

The bubbles have also been great fun. Dima catches on pretty quickly and will copy anything you do. Vitali mostly just spills bubble juice everywhere and wants whatever Dima has. You are probably noticing that I have not mentioned Oksana very much. She has pretty much abstained from the balloon and bubble blowing. While the boys play we try to ask her some questions and see what kind of information we can get out of her.

On the second visit we also took the stuffed animal puppies (su-ba-ka) that Aunt Puddin had given us (thankfully we have three of everything - just in case) and they were a great hit. The next day when we visited Oksana had hers sitting on her bed.

We have also given Oksana to - keep with her - the photo book I made with the family pictures. We have shown it to everyone, even the orphange Director and everyone is appropriately impressed with the family. Most are overwhelmed by the sheer size of us because most families here have only one or two children. All my translations were correct except apparently the word I have for Murphy means potato. Who knew - I just used what the computer gave me. (As an aside - for a country that eats more potatoes than anything else they do not eat sweet potatoes. Ramon (our facilitator) has said you could start a business here selling them. So for any budding entrepreneurs out there the Ukraine is ripe for a new type of potato!)

We did not include any pictures of the inside of our house in the album and Ramon has asked us to try and get some. So Rachel and Tadd have gone by the house to take some inside photos. Rach is sending them to us even as I type and Tadd played with the puppies even in the pouring rain (earning some brother-in-law points). Joe's work e-mail filtered them out as spam so she is having to use a different account and send them one at a time. This is making up for some of that time I had to go and register with her at Babies R Us and there were 450 different kinds of bottles and nipples. It took us an hour just to get over to the bath product row. Anyhow, the book doesn't have these pictures because I thought my audience would be younger. Ramon thinks they will help Oksana identify more with that being her new house. We hope so.

Back to the presents. The absolute best presents so far have been the blankets that mom made - 3 boy and 3 girl. We had Ramon explain that mom makes a blanket for all the grandchildren and they get to choose the one they want. Oksana chose the one with the bears on it, Dima the one with the cowboys and Vitali the one with the alphabet letters. The others we will donate to the orphanage before we leave.

What we wish we had brought with us is a picture book of North Carolina. Even if our intended audience is too young it would have been nice to show the adults and leave as a gift for someone.

All in all the gifts have been pretty good. This weekend in Kiev we got a journal book for Oksana and some earrings because we felt she had not had too many age appropriate gifts. We also got the boys a toy car and Joe impulse bought more bubble blowers - this one blows about a hundred bubbles at a time instead of 5-10.

We leave at 7:45 in the morning to head back to town and hopefully get the paperwork going. Ramon told us this afternoon that he has appointments with the Inspector and the Director and that all of us are going to meet with the Judge. We shall see what tomorrow brings. Just a reminder that we are back in the internet free zone so we will try to give Rachel as many details as we can.

Random Observations:
- you have to pay for grocery bags - we like this idea
- they have grocery carts that drive sideways - really fun to play with
- a lot of potatoes are consumed here
- when there are no lines on the road you get to drive anywhere you like - this is actually more fun in the country where there are not a million other cars doing the same thing - although this does increase the level of difficulty - if you are getting points like in gymnastics or diving!
- taxis basically get to make up their own prices as none of them have meters in their cars
- where there are no parking lots you get to park and drive on the sidewalk - the guidebook said keep your eyes open and they were not wrong!
- we have about seen a million accidents but surprisingly only one actual accident
- stillettos are everyday wear
- PDA is rampant

Thanks for all of the support - it really makes a difference!

Tonya & Joe

Dinner with Steve and Shirley

2008-03-30T01:19:00.000-07:00

We met Steve and Shirley last night at TGIFriday for dinner. We felt like we already knew them from the many e-mails we had sent each other and through information from Wendy (their new BFF). The food was American and so was the conversation and three hours flew by. It was so nice to talk to someone who has/is had/having our same experiences. At one point we tried to talk about something other that what is going on but very quickly the conversation turned back to our Ukraine experiences. There is a little community of folks here who have connected on the steps of the SDA or while waiting in line. Steve and Shriley have the bonus of having internet access at their apartment and have been keeping up with several of these other folks. Here is the link to Steve and Shirley's blog http://zimnesfamily.blogspot.com/ so those interested can keep up with them as well. It is always good to meet nice folks, it is just a shame they live in Ohio! We posted a picture of the four of us below (notice the TGIFriday sign in cyrillic behind us).

We were "celebrating", not sure that is the word I want to use, day 21 here and Steve and Shirley day 28. We have two more days in Kiev before heading back to no-name city and Rachel will take over our posting duties again. Our main goal is to eat as much as we can. We are going to make a grocery store run either today or tomorrow to stock up on some goodies before heading out.

We are hopeful that some paperwork will begin in earnest on Tuesday. The orphanage has ten days to do their part, then all that comes back to Kiev to the SDA for five more days, then back to no-name for a court hearing and then another ten-day waiting period for the adoption to become "official." Then the fun is just beginning as we have to bring the children to Kiev and they all have to have medical checkups, then a trip to the SDA and then a trip home. Still feels like forever away and I have been ready for my bed for two weeks already. Not to mention food that we recognize. As Shirley said last night sometimes it sems like our time here has flown by and sometimes it feels like it creeps. When I type in what still has to be done it feels like creeping.

Just an FYI to everyone - Daylight Saving's Time kicked in here in the Ukraine last night so we are back to seven hours ahead of you guys.

So excited to hear about our Tar Heels and very bummed that we are missing the tournament and NASCAR races.

Love to all -

Tonya & Joe

Back In Kiev !

2008-03-29T02:04:00.000-07:00

Our trip back to Kiev was pretty quick. "Silent Ray-Ban Guy" drives a lot faster than Nikolai. We were dropped off about 1:15, and were ordering Big Macs by 1:30. We had pizza for dinner. After our first two American meals in a week we were feeling pretty good.

The hotel where we are staying in our no name town actually has a pretty good restaurant, with an American menu. The trouble is that even written in English most of the food is not what we want to eat. We have found a few dishes that we seem to eat over and over. I like this slaw they have which is basically shredded cabbage tossed with lemon and orange juice. They also make something they call a slapjack (which I anticipated being a pancake), but is actually fried mashed potatoes served with sour cream - yummy. They make fried patatoes with onions just like dad - also yummy. Have you noted the potato theme? It continues... Joe found a stew with meat and potatoes he likes and he has eaten fish several times. They also make good mashed potatoes. Our menu would be ever so much larger if we were fans of raw fish (in various forms), liver (also in many forms) and smoked sausages.

We think the name of the town is something close to Radimashel (definitely not an exact spelling). Joe has included a couple of pictures. The one of the big white building with the statue out front is there government building. The statue is V.I.Lenin. When we first came to town and were looking for the government building Nikolai just stoped in front of it and said here we are. Ramon wanted to know how he know and Nikolai responded that the Lenin statue was a giveaway for the government!

We also have a picture of an intersection and the plethora of potholes that abound, not just in this intersection but all up and down the roads. We had read that the roads were pretty rough but had not really seen anything but the main roads up to this point. The roads in Kiev are great as are the main roads through the towns - but turn down a side road and the picture is what you get. Try riding down one in a taxi and you can imagine that the entire ride is spent swerving from one side of the road to the other.

Outside Kiev it is not uncommon to see many horse drawn carts. We have said several times that they look like something you would see in a picture from the 1920's. Lot's of stereotypes abound here. This one looks like one of the Ledbetters is driving! (My family will understand this.)

The large red brick building is the orphanage, at least it is one of the orphanage buildings. Ramon has said several times what a large facility it is. The right side of the picture is the dorm and to the far left is the administration (main office) and classrooms. On our second meeting with the children we met in their science classroom. Looked very much like one of ours with some fish tanks, a periodic table, a couple of rabbits, preserved things in jars, etc.

The school is close enough to town that we have been walking back and forth - which is the best thing to do considering the condition of the streets. Also, I have not been able to figure out how taxi's determine their fares because none of them have a fare box. You just get where you are going and they say an amount and you pay it?!

Both Joe and I get to meet with the children 1-2x daily. The boys are always playful and curious, and Oksana is getting more and more used to us on a daily basis. Oksana is a very mature 12 year old, and has obviously had a lot of experience caring for her brothers - they listen very closely to everything she says. It is pretty amazing to see how quickly she can corral her brothers when they get out of line - we wish she did not have such responsibilities placed on her so early in her life.

Joe and I will head back to the orphanage on Tuesday (its Saturday today) and will work on getting documents together so we can set a court date - our next big hurdle. Thanks to Rachel for updating the blog while we have been away! We will likely be back out of internet contact for the next several days/weeks.

By the way, we have been in contact with a few folks that are pursueing adoptions here in Kiev - thay all have similar stories of delays and frustrations with the "process." Please keep Steve and Shirley, David and May and all of the other families fighting through this process in your thoughts and prayers!

Tonya & Joe

Paperwork has started!

2008-03-27T16:32:00.000-07:00

One more day of updates from Rachel and then hopefully we can hear from Tonya and Joe tomorrow or Saturday as they return to Kiev for the weekend.

I spoke with them live today for a few minutes. They sounded tired but encouraged with the events of the past few days. I am not going to pretend to understand all the paperwork (Tonz and Joe will have to help us out with those details) but they did receive a letter from the orphange today regarding their intentions to adopt the children and they also received a letter from a Notary stating that they intend to adopt the children, so the process has begun. They said that the paperwork process at this orphanage is slower than at some of the others so they anticipate it to take two weeks to be completed.

Konstantine had arranged for Oksana to talk on the phone with a 19 yr old girl,now living in the USA, that had been adopted from the Ukraine at age 15. This was awesome because the 19 yr old was able to speak to Oksana in her language and tell her about the USA, the opportunities, what her life might be like, etc... Tonya and Joe said they could see an obvious change in her demeanor following the phone call. She seemed to be more relaxed and was starting to show a little more emotion than previously. Hopefully each visit will provide more of a comfort level as they get to know each other.

Hopefully the next post will be from Tonya and Joe. The last thing they said before we got off the phone was "keep us posted on the tournament". Go Heels!

One step closer

2008-03-26T16:00:00.000-07:00

Word today from Tonya and Joe is that they had another good day of visits wtih the children. I think they are allowed to visit with them twice daily, not sure for how long each time. Although no formal conversation has been had regarding Oksana's decision, Tonya and Joe think they are operating on a tenative Yes. An appointment has been scheduled for tomorrow with the director so hopefully that will yeild a difinitive answer.

Yesterday they received 4 inches of snow but it all melted today. I think they are hoping to start the paperwork tomorrow and then possibly return to Kiev for the night to do some laundry (they haven't been able to do any at their current location), eat at McDonald's, and hopefully get internet access to send us an update themselves.

Another encouraging day

2008-03-25T07:04:00.000-07:00

This is Rachel again. Today's e-mail from Tonya and Joe described another good day of visits with Oksana, Dimi, and Vitali. It sounds like the care givers at the orphanage have been counseling Oksana about all the possibilities and options that she could have in the USA with loving parents like Tonya and Joe. Two good days in a row let's all keep praying for a few more! Below is an excerpt from their email.

"Roman has been excellent with helping us get through to Oksana, and is very instrumental in making this experience a positive one for us. He talked with Oksana about her current situation and what we might offer her in the US, and she told him that she felt good about the situation. We are taking things in small steps, but today was very encouraging."

Joe and Tonya

Somewhere in the Ukraine

2008-03-24T15:36:00.000-07:00

This is Rachel, Tonya's sister. Tonya and Joe realize that everyone is in desperate need of an update so they have handed over the controls to me (at least for today) so I can spread some news. I titled the blog somewhere in the Ukraine because Tonya and Joe are currently in a small town about 1 1/2 hrs West of Kiev that they don't know the name of. They have bought a few maps but the town doesn't show up on any of them. The town has one hotel, one restaurant, and yesterday they saw a horse and wagon. Not to surprising they have no access to the internet. Thank God for the blackberry and communication by e-mail or we would all go insane.

Tonya and Joe traveled to the orphanage on Friday expecting to get to meet the children they had been assigned at the last referral. They were told at noon that the director was out and to try again at 2......still no director, at 4....still no director...at 5 still no director. They aren't allowed to visit the orphanage on the weekend so they camped out in the one hotel and waited until today.

I am going to insert Joe's e-mail from today's visit. "Well, we had a good meeting with the orphanage administration this morning that finally led to a meeting with Vitali (boy age 3), Dima (boy age 6.5) and Oxana (girl age 12).All went very well overall, with the orphanage Director stating she thought we looked like able parents and that she could support the adoption. The big wrench in the works is Oxana and her decision to come to the US. Convincing a 12-year old to think about her future and leave the relative safety of the orphanage, all her friends and teachers, her Grandfather - basically her whole world - is a tall task. Something we have only a few days to convince her of.Tonya and I are looking forward to something getting easier soon!!!Joe"

All three of the children are in good health and have been in the orphanage for approximately a year. The Grandfather Joe mentions had been the primary care giver but placed them in the orphanage when he was no longer able to care for them. Noone wants to see the children seperated from each other. Tonya and Joe are going to spend the next few days visiting with the children and then ultimately Oxana will decide for all three. Wow!

Tonya and Joe really appreciate all the thoughts, prayers, and warm wishes from home. Now we are waiting again to see what the next few days will bring.

News - We Have Second Appointment!

2008-03-19T03:41:00.000-07:00

Just found out while we were sitting here that we have a second appointment tomorrow (Thursday) at 2:00. Konstantin sems to think this is good. I am not so sure.

There was no word Monday about a second appointment and so we met Konstantine yesterday (Tuesday) at the SDA to see if they knew anything else. When we left there at 5:00 there was no word. But at 12:30 today he called to tell us we have an appointment for tomorrow. He also told us yesterday that there were 100 couples waiting for a second appointment. I do not think that says anything good about their process and worries me more than a bit about the selection of referrals we may receive. Still hope prevails!

On another topic - Joe went in to the INC office here in Kiev yesterday and worked for several hours. It was good for him to visit and he took some INC goodies with him.

Tonya and Joe

Waiting Continues

2008-03-17T00:37:00.000-07:00

Tonya and I are continuing to wait to hear from the SDA on our next referral date - hopefully we will get some news later today or (more likely) tomorrow. We'll try to post when we hear something!

I've posted a few pictures at the bottom of the page - we've taken lots of photos to share once we return to the US.

Joe & Tonya

Appointment & Orphanage Visit

2008-03-15T01:57:00.001-07:00

So it has been several days since we have been able to get the internet. Hopefully this will catch you up.

Tuesday we were ready to go at 8:00. Keep in mind we still have no idea what time our appointment is. At 10:00 Konstantin called and said to meet one of his associates Giorgi outside in about 15 minutes. At 10:30 we called Konstantin who said Giorgi was at the train station and on his way. A few minutes later he arrived and we headed to the SDA (State Department for the Protection of Children). I am just going to go ahead and say that this day and Thursday have been two of the most surreal experiences of my life. Not anywhere near my comfort zone!

We waited outside the building and Konstantin kept checking inside every so often. There were several other people milling around outside and others lined up in the stairwell. We went inside after only a few minutes and into a pretty small office. There was a couple sitting at a small table right inside the door looking at referrals. We went into a back office that was probably about the size of a decent walk-in closet in the US that had a place to sit with a small round table in front. There were two desks in the room with workers at them (although I never actually saw one of the people do anything while we were there). A young woman sat down across the table from us and started showing us referrals. Konstantin translated what she was saying and we asked some questions as well. In total we saw three sets of children. In each set at least one of the children had some sort of serious medical condition (Cerebral Palsy, chest deformity, mental retardation, etc.) The "best" referral was of two girls with one described as having Cerebral Palsy. Then pretty abruptly the woman said, "So what do you think?" and both she and Konstantin turned to look at us. Talk about your spur of the moment decisions with absolutely no time or privacy to discuss. Joe and I put our heads together and decided to go visit the girls. Then the appointment was over and out we went.

Outside we talked briefly with Konstantin about the next steps. He then took us back to our apartment. We regrouped and went out to find some food and internet. In our wandering we found a McDonald's - thank you for Big Macs. After lunch we went to a mall nearby and got onto the internet to do some serious research about CP. Nothing we read made us feel comfortable about the referral. (Apologies - but we were too shell shocked to update the blog and I am not sure what we would have even said at that point.)

By the time we saw Konstantin that evening we had almost decided not to go visit. He had talked to the Orphanage Director who had made it seem that the children were even worse off than we had been told. This actually made Konstantin believe that she was crooked and was making everything up to save the children for someone who would pay more money. Joe and I decided we could not know for sure unless we saw for ourselves.

We left the apartment at 5AM Thursday morning for a 4 1/2 to 5 hour drive to a city in the western part of Ukraine called Khmelnytsky. Konstantin had arranged for Nikolai to drive and another Coordinator, Roman, to accompany us. Once we got out of Kiev the countryside was very poor. Joe actaully said it looked like something out of pictures from the 1920's. We do not have any pictures because we were moving past pretty quickly.

We arrived at the orphanage around 11AM and had gotten permission to go there first instead of checking in with the local Inspector. We were pleased to see the orphanage was clean and decorated. There were children playing outside when we arrived. We were led down a hallway and after turning a corner there were the two girls and 4-5 other adults. This was most surreal day number two. We spent about 30-45 minutes with the girls - Bagdana and Ivanca. We gave them a coloring book and some crayons and Joe blew up several ballons with the cool ballon blower-upper we brought with us. We then went to the Head Nurses Office to go over their files in more detail. After about 30 more minutes they said the same thing, "So what do you think?" People here must be used to making big decisions in a split second. I actually asked if Joe and I could go outside and talk things over, which we did, and we decided to refuse the referrals. Both girls actually had more severe medical disabilities than the SDA had in their files that we are not prepared to care for.

This was far from the end of the day. The rest went something like this:
- go see Inspector - get letter of refusal
- take letter to Orphanage - get another letter of refusal
- take letter to be notorized and back to Inspector

This all took from about 12 to 4:30 because of the driving back and forth across town and waiting for people to get out of meetings.

We left Khmelnytsky about 4:45 headed back to Kiev.

We got to our new apartment about 10:00. (We are staying at a different apartment. This one is actually nicer even though we have not found a grocery store close to us yet.) It is on the ninth floor and the couple who owns it actually lives on the same floor. The buildings are pretty interesting - there isn't a central hallway like in American apartment buildings but several different entrances that serve about 4 apartments. The couple was Peggy and Tony - they were actually still cleaning the apartment when we arrived and they did not speak English but their daughter Sasha did (she has been taking English for 8 years and is now 16) and her parents asked us to go across the hall and sit in their apartment while we finished. So off we go with Sasha. She was very nice and we asked her lots of questions about school and her English studies.

When we did get in the apartment we just flopped into bed and slept until 8:30 the next morning. Friday morning brought a quick trip by me to a McDonald's (I know - but thank goodness for cherry pies and Coke!) just up the street to get Joe some breakfast because his sugar was a bit low - probably as a result of eating only a granola bar, 3 crackers and some mashed potatoes the day before). We did go to a cafeteria-style restaurant the day before, while we were waiting for some documents, but the selections included a lot of fish and meat we were not prepared to eat with our prety long ride back on our minds. Sometime you will have to ask me about the bathroom experience on the way there but it is not something I am going to share on the blog!

After getting Joe's sugar under control we showered and did the tourist thing for the rest of the day. Determined to have a day where we ate three meals at the appropriate times we went back to McDonald's. Konstantin met us there and we turned our dossier back over to him and the letter of refusal from the Inspector. He was going to try and turn it in yesterday at the SDA and ask for a second appointment.

We parted ways and Joe and I went to St. Sophia's Monastery - the oldest church still standing in Keiv. History teachers will appreciate that this is where Yaroslav is buried, at least it is where his sarchphagus is located. It was way cool. We also saw St. Michael's chuch.

We met Konstantin to sign our letter for a second appointment and then headed back to the apartment. Dinner was at Arizona (an American eatery) and then we went to sleep pretty early.

Today we are back at Arizona for breakfast - mainly because we saw that they have free wi-fi access. Not sure what today will bring. Looks like the soonest we will find out about our next appointment will be Monday or Tuesday. We may end up returning to the States for a few weeks before coming back to Kiev again. The Ukraine government is not exactly organized. Not sure when we will get back to the blog but hope this gets everyone caught up.

Love to all,

Tonya & Joe

Our First Full Day In Kiev

2008-03-10T09:53:00.000-07:00

Well, we did get on the 6:45 (more like 7:30PM) flight out of RDU. Landed at London - Gatwick about 7:15 AM (London time). A trip through customs and reclaiming of baggage gave us about 3 hours before our flight from Gatwick to Kiev. We found a quiet spot to sit down. Joe found a Krispy Kreme donut place and diet coke and we chatted with a nice man from San Francisco for a little while.

We checked in with Ukraine Airlines, made another trip through security and found our way to the gate. If it is possible I believe the space between the seats was about the smallest space I have been in. If Joe was 1 inch taller he would not have fit at all. 3 1/2 hours later we landed in Kiev. Customs was not that bad. Waited for about 10 minutes for Konstantine, threw all our stuff in his car and off we went. Do not ask me where we went, it felt like we took a tour of the entire city. We stopped to change money and drop off some paperwork. We finally made it to our apartment sometime after 7:00 PM (Kiev time). Konstantine helped give us a quick tour of the area - mall, grocery store, internet cafe (looked sketchy - found a better one today) and a couple of restaurants. He went to dinner with us and answered our many questions about the adopotion process.

We went to sleep around 11:00 PM (Kiev time) and rolled out of the bed at 12:00 (PM) today. After a quick tour through the mall we had some yummy pizza for lunch, tried to figure out where we are in Kiev (still not sure), and went out again to find an internet cafe. We did try to look at the sketchy one Konstantine showed us last night but thank goodness it was not open and not far down the street we have found us a nice Cafe that has free wi-fi as long as you buy something. I do not recommend the COKE as it comes room temperature (note to self). We need to go back to the mall to get some flowers to take to our appointment tomorrow (still do not know what time) and make a quick trip through the grocery store.

Tomorrow is our appointment with the central adoption agency - we will learn about our prospective new family! Keep us in your thoughts!

Tonya & Joe

Hitch In The Travel Plans!

2008-03-08T13:29:00.000-08:00

Well, the first leg of our trip has not gone as well as hoped - I'm sure the rest of the trip will go much smoother.

Our original plan had us well on our way to Kiev from Raleigh at this point. However, here we sit in the RDU airport waiting to leave. It appears the weather in the midwest US has slowed air traffic across the country, and our flight has been delayed such that we can not make our connecting flight to Kiev. When we inquired about changing our flight, we we told nothing else was available until Monday! Thanks to a friendly and sympathetic Delta employee at the gate (thanks Carolina - Delta ID 393619), Tonya and I will be re-routed on another air carrier and will (hopefully) arrive in Kiev only 9 hours later than originally planned!

So, our adventure has definietly begun! We have updated our coordinator in the Ukraine with our new flight arrangements, but here it is for the rest of you:

RDU to London-Gatwick Flight 174 American Airlines
Depart RDU 6:45PM Arrive Gatwick 7:00AM (Sun., March 09)

London-Gatwick to Kiev Flight 502 Ukraine International Airline
Depart Gatwick 11:30AM Arrive Kiev 4:50 PM (Sun., March 09)

Tonya and I are hopeful that this is the first and last hitch we will encounter!

Keep checking her for new info -

Joe & Tonya

Travel Plans

2008-02-15T18:16:00.000-08:00

Here's our flight schedule!

Saturday, March 8, 2008
Delta Air Lines # 6140 Operated by: FREEDOM AIRLINES INC
Departure Raleigh (RDU): March 8, 12:50 PM EST
Arrival New York (JFK): March 8, 2:29 PM EST

Delta Air Lines # 88
Departure New York (JFK): March 8, 3:40 PM EST
Arrival Kiev, Ukraine (KBP): March 9, 8:05 AM EET